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Lucy Bare

Some things are better in black and white

All people have a need to feel protected. It is a primary necessity that follows us from our birth through to our final day. The need intensifies as the emotions center on being vulnerable or fragile, and often have a way of shaping our choices and life experiences. This human condition has led us to build walls, both physical and emotional, to harbor the feeling of safety. We use these walls as a mechanism to fortify ourselves from the things that frighten or trouble us, both past and present. It is here, within these confines, that we have the illusion of feeling emotionally safe and protected. But these walls are limiting. They obstruct the path to living our true potential. They also isolate us, often intensifying the same feelings we were trying to keep at bay. We find ourselves reliving moments of intense insecurity, depression or anxiety. These past feelings spread like wildfire, colliding with our present emotions and controlling our outlook on life. It can be a challenge to find courage to talk to someone. We may have many inherently personal circumstances that we might not be willing to openly discuss. “Where do I start?”

Journaling is a powerful medium of reflective practice. It is a strategy for structuring our approach to self-reflection. It gives us the ability to self-actualize and verbalize our walled emotions in conscious thought. It is an outlet for our creativity, a way to pen our principals and purge the subconscious of self conflict. One word, two, three; and we are writing about the monster that previously consumed our thoughts. We feel the emotions and see the black edges of her coat. The shades of possibility become visible as our thoughts take shape, and allow us to examine our own words with purpose. It can be a catalyst to finally put something behind us and moving on. An honest recount can bring awareness and insights that can help us evaluate where we are investing energy. Examining our narrative with a new perspective can lead to clarity of goals and intentions, and remove our fears around them. By writing we can dig deeper to examine our expectations, disappointments, and challenges in an objective non-judgmental way, opening a path to self forgiveness and healing. All in our own time, and in a solo situation.

I discuss many themes around journaling thoughts and feelings in my Wellness sessions and guides. A basic reflective framework, centered on the Gibbs Reflective cycle, can be applied to your daily life. Start your reflective practice by structuring your journal as follows:

Description – What happened? Feelings - How did it make you feel? What are you thinking? How does it make you feel now? Evaluate – What was the intention of the situation or person? Analysis – What sense can you make of the situation or person? How does it limit you? Action - What steps will you take to move on?

“If I speak of myself in different ways, that is because I can look at myself in different ways.” ― Michel de Montaigne. Wishing you a magnificent view on the other side of the wall. Sending so much love.

Lucy


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